Alison Clement

observations from a novelist who sometimes wants to say something small and see it published immediately

Q: You once worked as a waitress, as did June in your latest novel, Twenty Questions. What anecdotes about your restaurant days can you share with readers?

Don’t get me started on waitress stories! Restaurants, as June says, are passionate places, full of unpredictability and eccentricity. And they are full of stories. I’ll just tell you one. . . .

One night when I was working I had a customer who was eating alone, a handsome fellow, and, as he ate his meal — a good meal: grilled salmon and wine — he was writing on a pad of paper. I always wanted to know what my customers were up to, and pretty soon I could see that, among other things, he’d written the name of a friend of mine. I had to admit to him that I was a nosey waitress, and I asked why he’d written my friend’s name. The customer was Kevin Krajick, a writer, and he’d come here to the Oregon coast from New York to work on an article about the forest. He was looking for a man named Chuck Willer, because he hoped to interview him. Chuck was an environmentalist. “Oh,” I told him, “I can get you an interview with Chuck. He’s my husband.”

Categories: Uncategorized

4 replies

  1. >Hi Alison! I hope you find this. Waitress stories….. My most embarassing moments came as a waitress. Once I dived into a man’s crotch to retrieve the dollar tip he dropped into his lap. That was a big tip in 1975. What a look of surprise on his face! Then there was the time someone found my fingernail at the bottom of their malted milk glass. I didn’t charge him for the malt. Love, Laura

  2. >I have a friend who was eating at a fancy restaurant on the coast and found a used bandaid in her clam chowder.Yikes.

  3. >ps how did you know it was your fingernail?

  4. >Oh, also– I once opened a container of yogurt and found a pubic hair. When I wrote to the company about it, they sent me a tshirt.

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